Throughout her life, Carlin Holden fought against the injustices that surrounded her. She didn’t care much for the opinions of those who tried to discourage her.
One memory that Sam McWilliams, a close friend of Carlin’s, has of her was Carlin’s insistence on feeding the squirrels on her back porch. At all times of the day, regardless of who was around, and regardless of what they would say to dissuade her, Carlin would venture to her back porch. There, she would provide for the creatures humans displaced from their natural state. “She had this stubbornness for justice,” Sam recalls. “She possessed a loving care, but with a fierce directness.”
That stubbornness for justice became a lifelong commitment after Carlin moved from her home in Connecticut to San Francisco. When she arrived, two of the first people she met were a couple who lived in the apartment above her. The couple enjoyed frequent meals with her, they traded stories regularly about each of their respective days, and built a lasting friendship enjoying activities both inside and outside their apartment complex. Her best friend, Randy, was also a staple in her early days in San Francisco. He helped Carlin feel like she’d found a home on the opposite side of the country. Tragically, in a matter of years, all three of these friends died from AIDS.
Many others around the City and across the country were dying as well. Vibrant lives cut short. Names forgotten. And in response, the US government was shamefully silent, seemingly indifferent. Carlin joined a rapidly growing community of individuals outraged by this cruel injustice and fought to ensure that both the atrocities of the AIDS crisis and the lives of those lost would never be forgotten. She met other equally passionate individuals who had also suffered tragic loss (like Sam, who lost her father to AIDS) and supported them throughout their grief.
“She taught me that you can’t do it alone,” Sam recalls. “I feel her helping me every day, more than anybody I’ve ever met.” One of the places that Sam and Carlin bonded was the National AIDS Memorial Grove. A 10-acre memorial honoring lives touched by HIV/AIDS, this sacred space was created by thousands of community volunteers, like Sam and Carlin, who sought out positive ways to express their collective grief. The Grove ensures that lives lost to AIDS are not forgotten, and it serves to tell the story of AIDS, and the AIDS Movement, to current and future generations so that they may understand the harm caused by fear, silence, discrimination, and stigma.
“The Grove is her place,” Sam says of Carlin. “She looked like this woodland sprite when she was there, exactly where she belonged.” Carlin’s connection to the Grove grew over time, eventually leading her to join the board of the National AIDS Memorial, where she served, with purpose and intention, for many years.
Her passion for making a positive impact on the lives around her persisted throughout her final years and months. “Even when she was in intensive care, she was incessant in calling all her friends,” Sam remembers. Before Carlin passed, she added the National AIDS Memorial to her estate, to ensure part of what she left behind would continue to go towards its mission to remember, in perpetuity, the lives lost, offer healing and hope to survivors, and inspire new generations of activists in the fight against stigma, denial, and hate for a just future.
Through her legacy gift, Carlin continues to leave an indelible impression on the lives she was passionate about helping, as she always has. “I was in charge of cleaning out her house after she passed,” Sam recalls. “And the whole time, the squirrels kept trying to get in to see her.”
What Legacy Will You Leave Behind?
Through the iconic National AIDS Memorial Grove and AIDS Memorial Quilt, the National AIDS Memorial honors and remembers, in perpetuity, the lives lost to HIV/AIDS. It mobilizes communities together around those memories and prompts action in the pressing health and social justice crises of today. Carlin’s legacy gift will ensure that the National AIDS Memorial continues to honor lives lost and drive change for years to come.
Thank you, Carlin, for your incredible support of those lost to HIV/AIDS and your dedication to the mission of the National AIDS Memorial. Your legacy will live on.
Learn more about how you can make a Legacy Gift:
